I have been in a long distance relationship for nearly a year to-date with my sweet boyfriend, Daniel. We were together for about ten months prior to him leaving for the United States Marine Corps, and I have definitely learned a lot since he left for Quantico. I know a good amount of people who are also in long distance relationships, and some of them have been asking me how I personally deal with the distance and what I have been doing to keep my relationship with Daniel strong? so I thought I’d share! But first, a little preview into how it all started?
I never expected, or even wanted for that matter, to be in a military relationship. The idea of having a loved one in the military was, and still is, pretty scary to me, and I highly commend those who dedicate their whole lives to the lifestyle. However, I am, in a big way, very appreciative that I am in a long distance relationship with Daniel.
When he first left, Daniel was only allowed to have his phone on weekends. I remember how rough it was going from seeing him basically every day to not even being able to speak to him on a daily basis. I think both Daniel and I can agree that this was the hardest part of our relationship, but we are so glad we went through it together. After ten weeks of barely talking, we were able to chat almost every day, and things definitely got easier! We’re lucky that our time difference was only a few hours as opposed to us being on opposite time zones! Since our year apart, I have been fortunate enough to spend time with him a considerable amount, which has given us comfort in the midst of our distance. And this brings me to my first point:
Make Time For Each Other & Show You Care
It is vital that you find time to communicate with one another, whether it be video chatting, a phone call, texting, or even handwriting letters, which is what Daniel and I did during our first few months apart. Even just a couple minutes of each others’ company will make such a significant difference, so shooting for this time together whenever possible will help you both along. Sending care packages and cute surprises is always fun, too!
Ensure That You Are on The Same Page as a Couple
Daniel and I weren’t dead set on getting married or anything like that when he left; we had only been together less than a year and neither of us knew what to expect going forward. However, we knew how strongly we felt about each other and were willing to fight for our relationship and see where the journey took us. The phrase “absence makes the heart grow fonder” has never felt more true, and this is the main reason why I am actually pretty grateful to be in a long distance relationship. I believe long distance is a true test to your relationship, but if you are with the right person, the distance will have nothing on you and you both will only come out stronger!
Trust is Key
A long distance relationship can be agonizing if you and your partner don’t trust each other. One worrisome thought can have you spiraling in no time, and this can lead to some pretty bumpy roads ahead. Having faith in one another and communicating and comforting each other whenever possible is all you can really do, but it definitely helps a ton.
Being apart from your loved one really sucks, but it is a great opportunity for you to grow as an individual! Especially when you’re having those sadder days when you’re missing your partner a little extra, spending time with friends or picking up some new hobbies will really help. I personally preferred to stay as busy as possible when Daniel first left, so I picked up some extra shifts at work and spent quality time with my roommate (and now she is one of my best friends)!
Everyone has their own ways of getting through these hard times since every relationship is different. But trust me when I say that it gets better! Look forward to how your relationship might flourish through the process. Keep pushing towards the idea that the distance might one day come to a close for good. You can do it!